The God of small things

It seem like my birthday this year is going to be one of the worse birthdays in the history of birthdays ....things did not work out as I expected them to(coming from someone whose idea of celebration birthday is disappearing throughout the day and getting back when no one is around, this years seems like its a predicted end of the world .... I hope things look up by monday# I need money.
This year is supposed to be the year everything gets better right? I want to live not just exist, I want to die knowing no matter how long or short my like had been , I was here, I did something, I was somebody, I stood for something. You see this past year has been about keeping scores, holding grudges .... Now I don't know if anything would change , I hope it will . for now I would hold on to the little things ....the smell of a new book, the satisfaction I get when I make something, friendship with a superior, security, cries of babies, pattering of feet's , a song of worship, the sound of the drums... This little girl is getting old!

If you want to read my birthday rant from last year read Running scared